in brief (a rant)

i’ll write a longer post later, but really? this is just me shaking my fist at the sky.

the past 6 weeks have been really tough for my family.

we’ve had two deaths and a job shake-up.

i’m legitimately unable to sleep because i’m terrified something else will happen.

when i do sleep, i have stress dreams.

i’m tired of crying to sleep. i’m pissed off that the universe was so RIDICULOUSLY unfair to my mom. i’m furious with the people who treated my dad like dirt.

i can put on red lipstick and wear sky-high heels and feel a bit more powerful, but frankly? it’s a thin veil for how broken i’ve felt recently.

i know that our problems are not the worst. that other people have worse stuff. but this has been 6 weeks of emotional sinkholes for our family. and i am sick of it.

i know for certain that people i know have been through this kind of stuff. how do you deal with it? is there a secret text on “how to be sad and still get through the day”? share, please.

thanks for listening, loves. sorry i’m such a grump.