i sort of loathe my doctor right now

this no-coffee, no-alcohol, all-the-water-you-can-stand regimen?





no coffee means i can barely construct a sentence until nearly lunch. truly. basic words elude me without my daily dose of morning coffee. which i should probably interpret as “i have a serious problem”, but instead i think i’ll just be sleepy and whine about it a lot.

no red wine at the end of the day is less troubling, really. though i’ve discovered that i’ve apparently been substituting dessert for a glass of red wine, and now that i’m not allowed any wine, i’m back to eating dessert. this seems to be a lose-lose situation.

all the water i can stand means that, and sorry for this, i have to pee every five seconds. she didn’t give me a minimum or a maximum amount, so i’ve got a ginormous water bottle and every time it gets empty, i fill it back up. this is probably not what she intended.

so. i’m sleepy, grumpy, and my gerbil-sized bladder is FURIOUS.

this? is not fun.