teachery thoughts (very early in the morning)

yesterday, my first class of the day was canceled so that we could work on a final project due before thanksgiving. i could so easily have slept in until noon. instead, i made myself get up at 8 and spent my morning getting ahead on projects. i wrote a lesson plan (that i teach today), i uploaded observation documents to a course, i outlined a paper. graduate school is getting me addicted to productivity. it is scary. in college i left things to the last minute and was not so obsessed with perfection. i think taking three years off before returning to school changed some chemistry in my brain. i really appreciate how lucky i am to be in a top 5 program, to be working towards a goal i really want to achieve…and the courses i’m taking, as frustratingly unorganized as they can be, are lighting a fire under me. i want to change the life of just one child in my first year of teaching. or of two. or of three. or change the lives of all my students. but just one, for right now, that would be stellar. and i’m realizing that if i want to hold a fourth grader to high standards, i have to hold myself to those high standards. so as much mental anguish as i put myself through over grades, i think it’s worth it. i’m gaining a new love of learning because i can see how what i’m learning will apply to real-life situations.

anyhow. those are my early morning teaachery thoughts. i was up early today to finish a paper. now to relax before i go teach a lesson.