houston, we have a problem

today a few of us in the graduate program realized that the handbook – which is not a handbook, but a carefully hidden pdf on the website none of us ever checked after getting into school – has, on page 7, at the bottom, a single line.

“VCLA scores are due by December 15, 2011”

erm. what? and really, “what” to a few things. “what is the vcla?” (some standardized test, on writing i think…) “what! it is due when?” (december 15. or “just soon, so you can graduate”. helpful). also “what! who was going to tell us?” apparently no one, i was told that it is on page 7, therefore we should have known.

see. here is my major problem with my program – the students in the 5-year undergraduate program are told about ALL of the out-of-school requirements. we aren’t. i’m wondering if the assumption being made is that, because we are graduate students, we know to check the handbook-no-one-mentioned.

the snarky anger within is really eager to let them have it. mostly i think i want to go to someone’s office, make a panicked face, flail my hands, and go “LOANS. I HAVE LOTS OF LOANS.”, because, y’all, i do. and i have some level of expectation that my decision to leave the workforce, take out loans, and return to school…would be respected. and i would get high-quality stuff out of it. i am. i love my classes. i have made great friends. but i also feel like the organizational structure required is lacking. and that makes me grumpy. and flaily. or, to quote me earlier…

“a spiteful alcoholic”

no one wants that, trust me.

so i’ve sent another email, explaining that none of the graduate students knew this, and we’re all a bit panicked, and an email explaining the various expectations we’re apparently held to would be much appreciated. some part of me feels weird, sending an email that’s like “hello, person with more degrees, I AM DISAPPOINTED IN YOU”, but mostly, i feel like i’m in the right here. we were promised a lot of things in this program, and while i’m getting a lot out of it, i am also kept in the dark on certain things, and feel lost when i see the light (the light on page 7, apparently), and i strongly dislike the assumption that we know what to do. we don’t. we’re panicking. and asking for actual guidance and support is NOT too much.

in other news: two hours till break. HUZZAH.